The times we shared is like shooting star… the time is short but really beautiful moments…. Forever engraved in our hearts…. Friends forever~!!!

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

The seven dwarfs always left to go work in the mine early each morning.

As always, Snow White stayed home doing her domestic chores. As lunchtime approached, she would prepare their lunch and carry it to the mine.

One day as she arrived at the mine with the lunch, she saw that there had been a terrible cave-in. Tearfully, and fearing the worst, Snow White began calling out, hoping against hope that the dwarfs had somehow survived.

“Hello, hello!” she shouted. “Can anyone hear me? Hello!”

For a long while, there was no answer. Losing hope, Snow White again shouted, “Hello! Is anyone down there?”

Just as she was about to give up all hope, there came a faint voice from deep within the mine. “Vote for Hillary, Vote for Hillary.”

Snow White fell to her knees, crossed herself and prayed,

“Oh, thank you, God! At least Dopey is still alive.”

There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally,
and by hand.

This virus is called Weary-Overload-Recreational -Killer (WORK). If you
receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via
any means DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life
completely!

If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take
two good friends to the nearest grocery store. Purchase the antidote
known as Work-Isolating-Neutralizer -Extract (WINE) or
Bothersome-Employer-Elimination -Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote
repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

You should forward this warning to 5 friends. If you do not have 5
friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your
life.

After a the 49ers terrible 24-0 shutout by the Seahawks, in arguably the worst monday night football performance ever, we have decided to start a petition to remove the 9ers from national tv……

Petition to remove the 49ers from National TV Forever

1. Kwaku Morgan

2. Steve Young

3. L to the J (if u put up a donut on Monday night national tv you dont belong.)

4. Roger Craig

5. Jerry Rice

6. Alfonzo Thomas

7. Dean A. Bardowell (Kwa, I can honestly say I agree PLEASE remove the 49ers ASAP…….

Dear Commissioner Goddell,

Please get the wack A*&….. 49ers off tv….. The End.

8. Joe Montana

9. John Madden…(also looking into banning them from his game)!!

10. Gatorade…(They owe us $750,000 for unpaid drinks from 2002 )!!!!!

11. Deion Sanders. I cant believe I brought my dance to that Organization!!!!

12. Egbavwe J Pela

13. Mark Enea

14. ——————

15. ——————

16. ——————

17. ——————

18. ——————

19. Hilary Clinton (If you vote me in as President it will be my first order business)

20. Barack Obama(I too will make it my first order of business as President)

21. Mike Tyson (That was humiliation degradation, and any other T-i-o-n word I can think off!!!!)

22. Dwight Clark…I should have dropped that pass in the back of the end zone!!!

23. TEAM X.. ( Banned from any San Fran Events!!!!!!!!!)

24. Rocky Balboa. Adriannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!

25. Hulk Hogan (They need their vitamins Brotha!!!!)

26. George Seifert

27. Frank Lucas (Just give me the word and they are all gone) My Man!!!!!

28. Charles Barkley (F The Bay Area)

29. Jeff George…I wouldn’t even play for them!!!!!!!

30. Pac-Man Jones….their Strip Clubs are A**!!!!!!!

31. MC Hammer (Cant touch This, or a win)

32. Mari (Jamars alleged Ex Girl) 49ers are A**

33. Features (Hey J I adore the picture, but your team is A**)

34. Nathan, Michael, Shawn, and Wanye (Its Not Hard to Say Goodbye!)

35. T.I.P….I got the guns lets take these fools out!!!!!

36. Fantasy Football….who would u pick??????

37. Jose Canseco (I got a box of roids in the trunk for those jokers) Trust me I wont tell.

38. Roy Hibbert

40. Associated Press : Associated Press Sports SEATTLE - This 49ers-Seahawks pillow fight on Monday night could be the worst thing on prime-time television since “Celebrity Boxing.”

41. Roy Jones (Yall must have forgot!!!!)

42. Omarion (You got served)!!!!!

43. Johnny Drama….You guy’s need a…

VICTORYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

44. Samuel Jackson (Who F*ck are these A**holes)

45. Kean football….(damn I thought we were A**)

46. Tag Team (Whoop There it is)!!!!!

47. Vizio…they messing up our HD!!!!!!!

48. Allen Iverson (Practice!!!!!!, man they need more than Practice!!!!!!!)

49. Tyrone Bigums….they need Red Balls!!!!!!!!!!! It gives u wins!!!!!!

50. Superhead…..damn they really suck!!!!!!!!!!

51. Cleo McDowell (They are A** Sickem Dotty!!!!)

52. Prince Akeem (I saw an A** Game between the 9ers of San Fran & the Seahawks of Seattle. It was a one sided Affair. It looked as if the 9ers were trampled by a heard of Elephants, it was a pumbling!!!!)

53. Florida Evans aka Good times Mom (Dam, Dam, Dam, ………)..

54. Jadakiss (Put your hands up, nah, nah Put your hands down!!!)

55. Pam Oliver….their sideline reporting is A**

56. Vanessa…..ur movies and ur team is A**

57. Michael Vick (Man I thought my situation was bad)

58. Notre Dame……man we should schedule them next year!!

59. Stevie Wonder (I am happy I cant see that trash)

60. Eric Gordon…ur team is A** jay!!!

61. The boy Beasley at Kansas State… Your team is A** Jay!!!!! (Remember who told you that!!!!)

62. The Nets (Yall are A** Jay)

63. The Bulls (Yall are A** Jay)

64. The Pistons (Yall are A** Jay)

65. The 0-8 Miami Dolphins…..how the F*ck did we lose to them bums….they A**!!!

66. Woodbridge ROTC……damn the 49ers are A**

67. Pratyush Buddiga ESPN spelling bee champ. (Can You guys spell WIN or how about Touchdown. It’s T.D. for short??????)

68. Craig Sager….I thought my suits were A**…they take the cake!!

69. Michael Blakson from Next Friday… (I can not get Jiggy to this Sh*t Man)

70. Louis Orr (Jay they are A**)

71.T.O….damn im glad I got outta therr!!!! They A**

72. Soulja Boy (No wins for youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu)

73. Jeff Garcia……who’s gay now!!! Lol!!!

74. Where’s Waldo. (I know you can’t find me, but can yall find the Endzone)!!!!!

75 Rick James (Score a TD B*tches)

76.Rice a Roni….the San Francisco treat…..took there rice elsewhere!!!

77. Jerome from Martin(You might as well roll with me because the 9ers cant score a TD)

78. Hustle man….I can get yall a win for 1500 hundred chief…..if not…. “yall better pick up the pieces”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

79. Miss Gerri from Martin (Yall are a sad excuse for a football team) Suit Me Up!!!

80. Bonita Bitrell from In Living Color - The 49ers should be banned….but I ain’t one to gossip, so you didn’t hear that from me

81. Calhoun Tubbs from In Living Color(The 9ers are A** Wrote a Song bout it, like to hear it? Here it go!)

**** This list is made up…and not all these people really added their names….it is a joke…..

The Bathtub Test

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the
Director how do
you determine whether or not a patient should be
institutionalized.

“Well,” said the Director, “we fill up a bathtub, then
we offer a
teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask
him or her to empty
the bathtub.”

“Oh, I understand,” said the visitor. “A normal person
would use the
bucket because it’s bigger than the spoon or the
teacup.”

“No.” said the Director, “A normal person would pull the
plug. Do you want
a bed near the window?”

ARE YOU GOING TO PASS THIS ON, OR DO YOU WANT THE BED
NEXT TO MINE ?

You Hit My Car - Steve Harvey Prank Call

Detective Work - Semen

We all know those cute little computer symbols called “emoticons,” where:
means a smile and
is a frown.

Sometimes these are represented by

Well, how about some “ASSICONS?”
Here goes:

(_!_) a regular ass

(__!__) a fat ass

(!) a tight ass

(_*_) a sore ass

{_!_} a swishy ass

(_o_) an ass that’s been around

(_x_) kiss my ass

(_X_) leave my ass alone

(_zzz_) a tired ass

(_E=mc²_) a smart ass

(_$_) Money coming out of his ass

(_?_) Dumb Ass

You have just been e-mooned!

Little Carol came into the kitchen where her mother was making dinner. Her
birthday was coming up and she thought this was a good time to tell her
mother what she wanted. “Mom, I Want! a bike for my birthday.”
Now, Little Carol was a bit of a troublemaker. She had gotten into trouble
at  school and at home. Little Carol’s mother asked her if she thought she
deserved to get a bike for her birthday. Little Carol, of course, thought
she did.

Carol’s mother, being a Christian woman, wanted her to reflect on her
behavior over the last year, and write a letter to God and tell him why she
deserved a bike for her birthday. Little Carol stomped up the steps to her
room and sat down to write God a letter.

LETTER 1:
Dear God:
I have been a very good girl this year and I would like a bike for my
birthday. I want a red one.

Your friend,
Carol

Carol knew this wasn’t true.  She had not been a very good girl this year,
so she tore up the letter and started over.

LETTER 2:
Dear God:
This is your friend Carol. I have been a pretty good girl this year, and I
would like a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you,
Carol

Carol knew this wasn’t true either. She tore up the letter and started
again.

LETTER 3:
Dear God:

I know I haven’t been a good girl this year. I am very sorry. I will be a
good girl if you just send me a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you,
Carol

Carol knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get her a
bike. By now, she was very upset.  She went downstairs and told her mother
she wanted to go to church. Carol’s mother thought her plan had worked
because Carol looked very sad.

“Just be home in time for dinner,” her mother said.

Carol walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. She looked
around to see if anyone was there. She picked up a statue of the Virgin
Mary, slipped it under her jacket and ran out of the church, down the
street, into her house, and up to her room. She shut the door and sat down
and wrote her letter to God.

LETTER 4:
I GOT YOUR MAMA.
IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.

Signed,
YOU KNOW WHO