Carol’s mother, being a Christian woman, wanted her to reflect on her
behavior over the last year, and write a letter to God and tell him why she
deserved a bike for her birthday. Little Carol stomped up the steps to her
room and sat down to write God a letter.

LETTER 1:
Dear God:
I have been a very good girl this year and I would like a bike for my
birthday. I want a red one.

Your friend,
Carol

Carol knew this wasn’t true.  She had not been a very good girl this year,
so she tore up the letter and started over.

LETTER 2:
Dear God:
This is your friend Carol. I have been a pretty good girl this year, and I
would like a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you,
Carol

Carol knew this wasn’t true either. She tore up the letter and started
again.

LETTER 3:
Dear God:

I know I haven’t been a good girl this year. I am very sorry. I will be a
good girl if you just send me a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you,
Carol

Carol knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get her a
bike. By now, she was very upset.  She went downstairs and told her mother
she wanted to go to church. Carol’s mother thought her plan had worked
because Carol looked very sad.

“Just be home in time for dinner,” her mother said.

Carol walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. She looked
around to see if anyone was there. She picked up a statue of the Virgin
Mary, slipped it under her jacket and ran out of the church, down the
street, into her house, and up to her room. She shut the door and sat down
and wrote her letter to God.

LETTER 4:
I GOT YOUR MAMA.
IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.

TEACHER: John why are you doing your math
multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell “crocodile?”
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L”
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I
spell it.
____________________________________________

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for
water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
__________________________________

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have
today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than
you are.
_______________________________________

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with
“I.”
MILLIE: I is…
TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, “I am.”
MILLIE: All right… “I am the ninth letter of
the alphabet.”

_________________________________

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his
father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now,
Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his
hand.
______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say
prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good
cook.
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